Sunday, August 9, 2009

Scary Ass Navy Watch...

This is Seaman Renshaw with another important announcement:

Today I went on a special type of watch called a Topside sentry. Robot probably knows what those terms mean but since none of you really have any Idea what I'm talking about, I'll explain what I did in as short a sentence as I can: I walked in a building checking classified vaults and making sure everything was locked, then I returned to the front and gave my report to the Petty officer of the deck. That's what a Rover does.

When I first arrived to the Lewis Hall, I looked at its integrity and observed that it looked similar to those buildings you see in horror movies: abandoned yet functional. (It took me ten minutes to find the front door to that son of a bitch). When I got inside I immediately went on my topside sentry rove. I would now like to point out that I was the only person in the building other then the person on the front desk. I would also like to point out that the maintenance in this building was super shitty. the walls had mildew caked from years of negligence, there was a drinking fountain that was flooded and broken, weird sounds came from the upstairs, some of the doors opened and shut on their own. What creeped me out the most was the bathroom: the bathroom when you first enter, had a flickering light directly above one of the two stalls. There was also a shadow coming from underneath the stall like someone was there. When I looked inside there was nothing, the shadow was gone after that.

I also went upstairs where the weird sounds resided. There were no lights, but I was required to check a door there: the roof access. That door was dead bolted. I didn't explore the rest it to see where the weird sounds came from.

In the end I have to wonder what madness lurks behind these vaults. Could it be mythos beings from another dimension in whom we perform experiments on? Could it be a new source of power... that's evil? Or is it just the chiefs porno and I'm shitting myself for nothing


  1. I bet it took you a lot of self control to not go running and screaming out of that building.

  2. That is so cool. Devin told me about this post and said it really did sound scary, and now that I read it I agree. I assure that the place is haunted. And c'mon, Nolan, I know you're in the military, but less cursing please!

  3. Grantula would like to announce to the world the following items:
    1.) He has had his nipple nibbled! Years ago.
    2.) He holds a grudge against Kimber that will be gone by the time he wakes up.
    3.) He can say "pooperscon" <- correct spelling.
    4.) He will miss Utah again.

  4. Ha, Stupid buildings alwasy make noise at night. Bathrooms are creepy at night. Still that sounds like a crappy building. I'd hate to have to guard that one.

  5. I am certain that your doom was close at hand.

  6. If you continually defy my attempts to put you into mortal danger, I may be forced to send you a CD again.