Today is Halloween and the tradition is that you give me all your candy. This is so I can inspect it for poisonous substances that could kill or permanently screw your brain up forever. So if you want to be safe then send me an email and I'll respond with my address. This email method is to prevent porno companies from spotting my address online and sending me free junk. This is also to prevent stalkers from hunting me down and stealing my virginity while I'm asleep. My email is email@example.com in case you're stupid and can't just click on my profile.
Also just in case you didn't psychically figure it out, this post is the special limited edition halloween post that was supposed to blow out your mind. Unfortunately, like usual I have nothing to really write about. I've noticed that lately most of our writing starts with no idea and ends with no idea. It all kind of has a pointless feel to it. Except Halloween isn't pointless, Halloween is awesome. It's the only holiday where you can dress up and get tons of free crappy candy. And if your too old then you still have options: you can take your younger sibling, your nephew/niece, or even your own child. In fact if you have a kid then you're kind of obligated. Every kid should get the chance to trick or treat.
I hope you all have a fun, safe halloween. I'm serious. Don't get a razor in your apple.
P.S. If you wanted something to look at then click here check out some crazy good pumpkin carvings.
1 hour ago